


Won’t You?

by VintageOwl



Category: Antisepticeye - Fandom, Darkiplier - Fandom, jacksepticeye, markiplier - Fandom
Genre: Comfort, Darkiplier - Freeform, F/M, Hurt, Kidnapping, Manipulation, Markiplier - Freeform, Mental Abuse, Murder, Physical Abuse, Rape, Romance, Sexual Content, Stockholm Syndrome, Violence, antisepticeye, jacksepticeye - Freeform, kind of amnesia reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-06
Updated: 2020-07-14
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:01:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 10
Words: 20,681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24577237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VintageOwl/pseuds/VintageOwl
Summary: You can’t remember how he found you and why you were his prisoner now but a part of you doesn’t want to remember. He keeps you locked away and you’re still not sure why, You’re not sure if you want to stay with him or flee and find your way home but then again was your real home ever safe? Where was your home?
Relationships: Antisepticeye x Reader - Relationship
Comments: 1
Kudos: 24





	1. Dreams

Her laughter is a melody, her smile is it’s instrument. Her eyes shine but lack warmth, something about has stopped her in his tracks. Maybe it was because she hadn’t run away yet or maybe it was the fact that her smile was fake as plastic.

“Will you hurt me?” She calls, sounding desperate as she stepped closer to him. Shesbegging and it’s disgustingly tempting for him

“Will you chop me up?” She paws at his chest lightly. like a kitten scratching, annoying and cute

“Make me feel the things I have forgotten.” 

“Inflict me with everything you have... angry, despair, hurt, love, lust... whatever you feel I want to feel too...”

“Why?” He asks watching brief surprise roll over her face before falling back into a hollowed smile

“because Jack, I can’t feel anything anymore..” he stares quietly at her in thought 

It’d be easy to kill her like the rest of her family but she was unique in Jack’s eyes, she didn’t run and cry for her life. She was asking for him, no. She was begging him to hurt her, her mind had cracked and fallen apart leaving a shell of a human.

“Please Jack... I beg of you... make me feel again.. “ she begs again and he can’t help but cup her cheek staring down at her. In his eyes she was the perfect puppet for him to fix and string up.

“Who said I know how to feel?” He says her expression doesn’t falter

“I didn’t but you know how to pretend, right Jack?” She says smiling his eyes widen briefly then crinkle up in delight 

“My name isn’t Jack. It’s Anti.”

-

I hated him but at the same time I needed him, to remind me how to feel again. I couldn’t live without him even if he did take me away from everything I loved.

~~_ You thought you loved them, but did they really love you? _ ~~

He’s angry because I tried to escape again, but that’s all he ever does with me. He just takes his angry out on me because no one noticed him, because no one wanted him, they all want Jack not Anti but I didn’t want Jack but I needed him, he made me smile even if he wasn’t real or at least as Anti claimed.

I tried to leave choosing to ignore his hollow threats, already tired of his petty jabs and bitter words but of corse he doesn’t like that, he doesn’t like that at all. He wants to punish me, to keep me forever, to frighten me into submission but it’s nothing new to me.

He yanks me by the back of my hair, a hiss escaping my lips, I clawed back at his wrists and he but it’s incoherent and angry sounding. We struggled with one another before I finally able to shove him back and try to run but he grabbed the back of my neck shoving me down and against my bed. I’m beneath him, flat on my stomach. I kept struggling a little till I feel him lurking over me. I freeze and look up at him I catch his eye, Those cold dead eyes. my gut tells me something isn’t right, he’s not looking me in the eye like he has always done countless times, that intimidating gaze is replaced by something much more horrifying to me.

His eyes are rolling down my body and it clicks to me the position I am currently in, horror feeds my thoughts. I can’t hear anything besides his breathing and it’s just enough to terrify me into thinking the worst. Bitter tears begin to squeeze themselves from my eyes, I shut them tightly trying to stop them from running down my cheeks. I’m trembling horribly and can’t help but to fear the thought of him doing this, to fear him hurting me this way.

I never imagined him doing such a horrid thing to me to punish me, I always looked up to him even with my body being lingered with bruises and cuts from him. Even with that knowledge I still saw him as something of a idol to me.

I struggled again trying to slid from under him but only end up flattened beneath him, his heaving chest pressed into my back. His smile is sadistic and his eyes hold dark desires and I can’t stop them, all I can do is silently beg him to stop. Instinctively I try to close my legs but he easily slides one of his thigh between them forcing them open to stay open. He leaned in close to my ear and nibbled it, my tears dripped onto the mattress below me and I expected him to continue, to further violate me but he pauses and croaks into my ear a quiet question for me

“Have you ever done it before?”

I choke on the gasp in my throat and I can’t help but flinch as I feel his leg rubbing my nether regions. I let out a sob, his free hand grips my tear stained jaw but I can feel him flinch and stop all his actions. the look on his face fades, his touch reels back and his breath hitches before he speaks again 

“No... no I didn’t mean it like that..” he seems to be talking to mostly himself at this point but thankfully he lets go of my neck and gets off me. Everything is far from okay, I’m not alright, no if anything I’m broken just from him competing the idea of defiling me like that, of threatening me with his filthy thoughts.

My body is throbbing out of adrenaline and panic he seems to still be in state of shock. I twist myself onto my back and move into the wall hiding myself away from him in a false protective ball.

“I would never! I never was going to...” he yells to me but I can’t listen, cannot fathom the idea of him like that. He’s still talking but it comes out more like begging but I hear no words only noises of desperation. After minutes of ignoring him and hollow apologies he leaves me and I sob into my ball, trying to piece myself back together.

I didn’t leave my room for two days, in those two days he showed up more than usual. Through out the day he stopped by often, I wouldn’t say hourly but pretty close to that. He’d offer me a fancy dinner instead of the usual grub and even went as far to get me stuffed animals as if he was apologizing to a child. Along with his guilt gifts he begs for me to drink some water so I wouldn’t die from dehydration but all I could think maybe being dead wouldn’t be so bad.

On third day he didn’t beg instead he got on the bed with me and immediately I freaked. He reached out for me, His eyes still had that cold dead look, I was sure he was going to hurt me again, to litter my body with bruises that I couldn’t hide or worse he had changed his mind about before. I yelped flinching. expecting pain or having him drag me to my quiet room instead of those things, he was just holding me tightly enough for me to have to breath through my mouth, maybe I was too tense but it felt like he was softly crushing me between him and the wall.

After a minute I worked up the courage to finally opened my eyes. I could only see the top of his hoodie and a tuff of green hair sticking out of it. He was hiding his face in my collarbone, his warm breath and facial hair tickled my skin. He smelled nice, fresh like nature somehow, nothing like how I had imagined him smelling, I’d always expected him to smell like blood or ash, or whatever death smelled like.

“It won’t happen again... it was just a bad thought...” he paused looking up at me “I just can’t lose you.” He confessed and somehow I felt the same but didn’t confess as he had just done.

_ ‘How do you hug someone back with thorns wrapped around every inch of their body?’ _

Everything seem to go back to ‘normal’ but in reality nothing was really normal around here, Anti was completely insane. One minute he’d be recording of the camera smiling away, talking like good ole Jacksepticeye then the next anti was screaming at me because I wasn’t in my room, I hadn’t cleaned something, cooked soon. He always seem to find something to yell at me about. On top of that if I wasn’t in a certain place, most of the time my room, it would agitate him and usually resulted in him always grabbing my arm enough to bruise or shoving me into a wall, a constant reminder who was the ringleader here.

  
Lately dreaming had been my only get away from him but dreaming always seem to get me thrown down a rabbit hole.

-

Everything was so dark, nothing like my normal dreams

“This wasn’t a dream.” I told myself, the world was nothing but a dark inky abyss

“There you are...” a voice in the darkness called, instantly I felt uneasy, tension was already building in my shoulders. No one was around yet I felt as if I was being suffocated by someone’s mer presence

“Did you miss me?” They asked. their voice was soothing and yet each word made my ears ache, it wasn’t loud but it still hurt for some reason 

“I missed you..” I felt breath on my ear and a harsh grip on my shoulder but I didn’t pay it much mind, my head was ringing and the world was beginning to look as if I was wearing 3D glasses

“no... I...” I hissed the words gripping my head, I couldn’t think straight

“Don’t you want to leave?” He asks. I shook my head, it felt like it would explode from the pressure at any given moment 

  
“I don’t know!” I cried feeling my knees buckle beneath me, blood seeped from my ears

  
“I just want you to come back home with me.” He called I felt sick everything was, like I was underwater, sinking further and further. Choking on the dark abyss around me, I could only thrash weakly till the darkness took over

  
“ _** Wake up ** _ _**!**_ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Little note! Reader doesn’t remember anything before meeting Anti.


	2. Nightmares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You want to trust him but can you really?

I jolted awake, my eyes wide and for a minute I felt unsure if this was reality or not. it took me a second to realize Anti was leaning over me, holding me up slightly by my upper arms. Before I could say anything I felt sick. My stomach churned, I shoved Anti aside grabbing the waste basket next to my bed and unloaded my stomach, Anti held my hair thankfully. I still felt sick but empty at the same time. Anti touched my forehead with the back of his hand

“your burning up.” He sighed. I half ignored him, I was still lost in thought about the strange dream 

“See this is what happens when you refuse to eat or sleep for two days..” his tone had a told you so to it and it only brought annoyance to me

‘Yeah and who drove me that state in the first place?’ I briefly thought before casting it aside he’d never listen.

“you should just get back in bed. I’ll go get some medicine.” His voice broke me from thought as he left the room without a second thought. He left and I felt fear creeping in. I didn’t want to sleep I was still creeped out from the dream. 

I sat up and immediately I noticed my shoulder felt really sore, I pulled my shirt down enough to reveal my shoulder, a bruise shaped perfectly like a hand was there but somewhere in my mind I convinced myself it was Anti. After he was officially gone I took a shower hoping it would make me feel better.

My mind flashed back to the dream I tried to recall his voice but I couldn’t remember anything besides how much it hurt. I finished showering and wrapped myself in a towel, I blow dried my hair a little as I stared at the fading bruises up and down my arms, minor cuts on my hands but the one bruise on my shoulder stood out horribly amongst the rest, maybe it was just my imagination but it looked bigger now. 

I came back into my room Anti was already back leaning over my desk, he was unpacking some different kinds of medicine for me, he looked like he had bought out the pharmacy. I sighed I didn’t even think I was sick but he seem to think so.

I chose to ignore him and dig in my dresser for some causal clothes. I heard the plastic bags stop rustling, I thought maybe he was done unloading whatever he had got. I felt his finger tips skim over my shoulder and upper back, I flinched badly whipping around to him.

“who did it?” His tone was silently angry, I could see little waves of glitches forming around him

“uh.. you did it?” I murmured nervously trying not to make him angry 

“no no I keep track.. I didn’t do this..” I could hear the angry becoming clearer in his voice

“Who did this?” He hissed he gripping my upper arms

“I don’t know!” I raised my voice a little, he snarled and multiple glitches of his face out burst from him, most of them screaming like him

“was someone here? Who?” He yelled obviously thinking I wasn’t being honest with him but I hadn’t seen nobody but him

“I haven’t seen anybody but you!” I yelled, struggling trying to pull back from his touch 

“I didn’t do this!” He screamed, his voice glitching as he did. bitter tears swelled in my eyes, fed up with him I yelled 

“Did you even look at the rest of my arms? What about those? Huh? Are they not as pretty as the one on my shoulder?” the bitter tears were now rolling down my face, 

he paused the angry faded from his face, his hands trailed down from gripping my upper arms to the fading bruises on my forearms and the small cuts on my hands from usually falling down when I tried to escape or pulling at some brush that was in the my way of my many failed escapes.

“You deserved these...” he told me, I scowled tears up still building up in my eyes

“you tried to leave me and I can’t let you go thinking that’s okay.” He said, laughter took over my tears were falling endless off my chin

“Really? Did I deserve you holding me down on my bed a week ago? Did I deserve you threatening to force yourself onto me?!” I screamed, he flinched a little at my words

“Please just tell me who did this?” He begged ignoring my words, his hand running back up to my shoulder 

“I honestly don’t know.” I tell him once again and finally he seems to somewhat accept my answer

“Fine. I’ll find out myself.” He states glitching out my door the door slamming itself shut leaving to me my own bitter thoughts. I put on some sweatpants and a t-shirt, not really wanting to get fully dressed but also not wanting to stay in my pajamas. I started to feel tired and heavy, maybe I was sick and just too stubborn to admit it. 

I laid back down glancing at the clock, it was 8 am. I decided it couldn’t hurt to sleep a little longer. Laying down, I clicked my light off and shut my eyes before beginning to try to sleep, I always found it hard to go back to sleep but right now I’d do anything to avoid Anti.

-

I was with my mom, we were heading to the pet store for something I couldn’t remember. I was excited and we were chatting about everything. I was happy, it looked like a good dream or so I thought. Just as she parked the car she got a call from my aunty and told me I could go in, telling me she’d be in a minute. 

I went in but instantly realized I went into the wrong store but I didn’t leave immediately, everything in the store compelled me to walk further in. It kind of looked like a Fred Meyers but more colorfully. I walked around the corner I bumped into someone and fell down taking a shelf of water guns with me

“oh I’m sorry.” They said, I felt a tiny pang of annoyance because they sounded sarcastic. I looked up to see their hand in my face, I took it and felt my guts flutter. I knew him and I use to love watching him but Anti didn’t allow me to have any electronic devices obviously afraid I’d reach out for ‘help’.

“Your Markiplier right?” I asked excitedly 

“I take you’re a fan?” He smiled widely, I nodded 

  
“I was but I haven’t been able to watch your videos...” I paused for a second, my mind drifted to reality

“lately.” I whispered 

“Aw that’s too bad. No internet?” He asked, I chuckled and shook my head softly

“no more like...a controlling mother.” I sighed 

“that strict huh?” He said curiously with raised brow

“Yeah... “ I murmured avoiding his eye

“Well... she’s not here now is she? Let’s have some fun!” He said suddenly he picked up one of the water guns off the ground and shot me, I probably looked surprised but I couldn’t help it.

We ended up having a water gun fight in the store, I was partially worried a store worker would get mad at us but no one seemed to be around besides just us. It ended in the plush toy section I was just laying in a pile of plush animals, panting I held up my water gun and uttered

“I surrender..” I coughed out, Mark was grinning menacingly above me

“no mercy.” He said then dropped another pile of stuffed animals on me, I squeaked in surprise then laughed, struggling trying to get out of the pile eventually I just kind of slid out onto the floor still laughing below him.

“That was fun.” I murmured standing up he smiled before checking his watch

“yeah. Oh shoot.. it’s already dinner time...” He said, I gasped my eyes went wide

“wait wait it’s nighttime already?!” I shouted looking toward the windows I realized it was pitch black out 

“I gotta go see if my moms still here.” I turned to run but he stopped me by my wrist harshly 

“I can drive you home.” his voice was different it wasn’t happy or friendly anymore it was dead and insistent

“Oh Uh... let me.. just go see if my moms still here or not.” I said quietly, a little caught off guard by him

“I’ll come with.” He let go of my wrist and followed me outside of the store. No one was here besides one suv and I assumed it was his.

“Yeeaah... I’ll take you home. Nice mom you got though huh?” He chuckled, I felt a little annoyance. We advanced toward his suv, I was hesitant in following him for some reason, my gut knew something wasn’t right.

‘It’s just Markiplier. Dumb wonderful Mark. I mean what’s he gonna do?’ I told myself getting in the passenger side. He was quiet on the way home but so was I. As we pulled up into my driveway I suddenly felt a wave of fear hit me

‘Do I really want to go home?’ I thought my guts twisted and panic spewed into my brain

“And here you are..” Mark’s voice broke me from thought and a chill ran up my spine I chuckled nervously 

“Y-yep this.. this is home..” I murmured under my breath, I got out slowly and walked up to the porch to the front door but instead of going inside I just stood there hesitantly.

“Wait... I wanted to ask you something..” Mark said I turned towards a little curious of what he wanted to know 

“Where did you get all these cuts and bruises?” He said taking my wrists outstretchingthem in front of me. I stared at my arms horrified as the ugly purple’s, browns, and green colors bloomed back onto my flesh even the little red slices on my hands reappeared

“It’s your mom isn’t it?” He said concernedly, I tried to pull back but he held my wrists tightly

“No... no...” I whispered tears filling my eyes, Mark hushed me

“It’s okay you can tell me... I can help you..” he hugged me and I whimpered falling apart in his arms, his mer touch made me realize how starved I was for love

‘He’s really cold..’

After a moment he let me go.

“Why don’t you come home with me? Just till you sort this thing out.” He said, I wiped away my stray tears and tried to form a smile again

“Are you sure? You don’t even know me.” I murmured

“Just come home with me. I don’t mind really.” He insisted, wavering it off like it was nothing but I was really just a stranger to him, how could he even consider letting me crash with him when I could be a complete and total weirdo.

“Just let me go inside and get some things..” I grabbed the door knob 

“No!” He yelled I jumped badly turning back towards him, fearful of his tone

“Just leave everything behind before anyone comes home and sees you..” he sounds kind of desperate and I found it a little weird but nodded regardless 

‘He’s right... we don’t have time..’ I thought following him back down the steps

“And besides we’ll have a blast at my place.. I have so many games we could play and tons of food..” he blabbered on. I smiled a little at his attempt to cheer me up. Mark got in the driver seat but I paused at the passenger door to stare up at my house, a little sad to leave it but then a thought occurred to me

‘How did Mark know where I lived?’

Mark sighed and was now behind me suddenly. I jumped out of my skin and whipped around to him. He looked angry.

“I just want you to come home.” He said I was pinned between him and the car door, I stared up at him horrified and confused 

“You’re not Mark...” I whispered, he chuckled quietly 

“Most people don’t notice. I’m flattered.” He said. I felt my breath hitch, sweat forming on my brow

“What do you want?” I finally asked 

“I already told you. I want you to come home.” He reached out to me and I flinched his hand hovered above my cheek

“See... now I will never hurt you...but can you say the same about him?” his hand dropped back to his side. I frowned unable to answer him, he looked impatient somehow liking he was waiting for some kind of answer

“He’s already hurt you over and over again. Ask yourself this, How long before he forces himself upon you again?” He grabs my upper arms firmly forcing me to look at him, My guts twist

“How long before he’s on top of you again and-“I cut him off “Shut up!” I choked, tears were stinging my eyes at this point 

“I don’t want to come home with you!” I yelled struggling away from his touch but he pressed against the car, refusing to let escape 

“You’d rather stay with your captor?” He asked another question, I shook my head fighting back the urge to cry

“I’d just rather not stay with you.” I hissed bitterly. He looked offended and ready to take me by force if needed 

“You’d rather stay with your possible rapist?” He hissed back and I glared with tears in my eyes, I couldn’t stand to be reminded anymore. He was basically taunting me with the knowledge yet demanding I leave Anti at the same time.

“Anyone would be better than you..” I whispered, he glared obviously finally done with trying to convince me with words 

“We don’t have time for this..” his voice echoed suddenly, hurting my ears. All his color and the color around him drained away into grey

“We’re going home..” he his hands clamped around my wrists, I struggled trying to yank back from him. I yelled “No!” And kept struggling, the effect of 3D blue and red outlined him now

“I don’t need your help!” I yelled trying to yank my wrists from his vis grip 

“Your coming home...” he insisted pulling me onto his shoulder, I heard him open the cars door, I was hitting his back with my force but it didn’t seem to faze him. he forced me in the back of his car and slammed it shut.  Desperately I crawled across the seat to the other door, watching him run around the car just as I opened the other door and crawled out, falling onto the ground.

I scrambled up onto my feet and ran toward the house I was terrified of it but I knew it was my only salvation. I ran up the steps again, I reached the door and grabbed the knob, he grabbed me by my hair but I didn’t stop. I turned the knob and felt my hair rip, I stumbled forward inside my house I looked back at Mark, he was beyond angry looking

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is heavily inspired off one of my first dreams I had about Markiplier. kind of weird saying that but it was because of this dream I start watching him.


	3. Infecting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s like you just can’t catch a break, the dark abyss in your mind has a hold on you and has no intention of letting you go.

I woke up with a small gasp. For a minute I focused on calming myself for a minute, failing to noticed Anti lurking over me by my bedside. When I did finally notice him, I jumped horribly returning to right back my frenzied state

“bastard...” I hissed trying to even out my breathing once again. He’s quiet for once but reached his hand out to me, automatically I flinched slightly but he just felt my forehead, checking my fever

“You slept all day.” He comments, surprised washed over my face. I searched for my clock spotting the glowing numbers of ‘6 pm’. His hand moved from my forehead to the side of my cheek even his gentlest touch managed to make me flinch a little.

“I’m not going to hurt you. You were good and I was wrong.” He admitted, I stared a bit wide eyed

“About what?” I asked, he pulled his hand away

“The bruise. “ he murmured, I relaxed a little but I didn’t want to act happy or proud I knew it was just result in him hurting me for something else 

“The security footage showed no one entering the house expect me and you through out the past weeks.” He said and I just hummed kind afraid to look at him, he crouched down by my bedside closer to me this time

“I’m sorry.. I don’t normally leave ones like that.” I finally looked him in the eye surprised he even apologized, he even looked kind of sad and pretty tired

“I usually keep track but.. maybe I’m just losing it..” he murmured casting his gaze to the ground, hesitantly I reached out and very lightly cupped his cheek

“It’s okay... “ I whispered, he stared back up to me with slight in surprise eyes, a soft scowl washed over his tired face 

“No it’s not okay... I am awful to you.” He stood up from my touch turning away from me, I frowned, sadness pooling in my gut for him

“It’s okay... you’re just angry with them... Jack’s fans...” I paused smiling a little, I stood up behind him I wrapped my arms around him, he tensed under my touch 

“I was Jack’s fan and that’s why you hurt me, right? you’re not Jack anymore, You killed him a long time again and learned how to mimicked him just so you’d feel loved but you’re not a monster either you just never inherited love from Jack. The only thing you got to inherit was hatred and sadness but you were never really Jack we’re you? You were always Anti, just Anti but nobody noticed you till now.” 

my thoughts flowed out through my mouth, I was a tiny bit afraid he might get mad but his trembling and teary eyes said otherwise. He moved to his knees and I followed him down into his ball of pity, he cried into my stomach and clung to my waist

“It’s okay... just take out on me..” I said smiling a little, beginning to pet his head

“I.. I don’t understand you.. .” he choked out 

“I’ll be fine, anti.” I hummed 

“But I don’t even remember it..” he murmured, for a second I didn’t know what he was referring to then I remembered the bruise 

“Yeah maybe the man in my dreams did it...” I joked with a chuckle

“What?” He hissed his glitchy voice whipped me back into the shell of fear. I could feel my blood run cold as I watched him sit up from my lap

“I had dream yesterday.. that a guy touched my shoulder..” I was murmuring my words, slow and cautious, afraid something would trigger him

“What did he look like?” He asked, confusion dwelled over me

“It was just a dream.” I sounded confused, Anti scowled and grabbed my upper arms. I flinched and cast my eyes to the ground, my gut twisting in anxiety 

“What did he look like?” he demanded an answer and here I thought I could change him, guess I was wrong, again.

“I-I don’t know... it was pitch black...” I murmured, blinking away the tears in my eyes

“Did he say anything?” He asked. Anti almost seemed to be on the verge of panic or a burst of angry, probably both.

“He... he asked if I missed him and that he had missed me. He wanted me to come home.” I told him quietly he stood up turning away from me, a loud sigh escaping him as he drug a hand down the lower half of his face

“Fuck!” He yelled,I flinched and slowly rose to my feet. He whipped around to me, grabbing my arms roughly,again. he looked me dead in the eyes

“Did you dream about him again? Don’t lie.” He asked more calmly this time like a parent patiently awaiting a child’s answer

“No... I mean what does it matter it was just a dream.” I asked quietly, his gripped tightened enough to be painful and I hissed automatically trying to pull back 

“What did you dream about?” His calm demeanor slipping back into his angry 

“I mean it was really weird and um...” my voice quivered and my mind drifted off to the memory of Mark’s angry filled face moments before I woke up

“Tell me, I don’t care what it was.. tell me..” he begs. I felt like I had done something bad but I couldn’t possible imagine where my dreams would be bad enough to make him make me confess it to him

_ Unless you had a controlling person like Anti dictating your every move _

“I.. was dreaming.. Markiplier was trying to take me away from my home..” I whispered, he looked to be in disbelief then turned away again, growling and fidgeting in a few glitches. He was literally in a panic over my dream

“Fuck... fuck.. it’s too late.. “ he muttered. I felt the need to flee from him, the air around us became thick and I stepped back, a sinking feeling pooled in my gut and panicked thoughts rolled over my mind

‘He can’t be serious can he? It’s was just a dream or rather a nightmare or maybe a dream.. Mark just wanted to help me, to take me away from you but I loved you... why would I want to go anywhere else?’

My thoughts raced, watching Anti have a melt down over my dream in front of me. He turned toward me with a deranged look in his eyes, like a wolf spotting it’s prey in the dead of night

“Anti?” I called out, backing up. The need to run felt urgent yet I couldn’t find the courage to do so. I bumped into my bed, panic swelling in my guts, I snapped back up at him. It was too late he was already shoving me onto the bed and crawling on top of me.

“No! no! Please don’t do this!” I screamed thrashing beneath him, fear racking my body. I expected the worse again, I expected him to push me beyond that edge and away from him. Instead of those dreaded thoughts, Anti tried to bite my neck but I shoved my hand in his face trying my best to fend him off, I was beyond freaked out now, of. he growled and grabbed my wrists bringing them together above my head holding them with one hand. 

  
I stared up at him horrified, this completely different part of him coming out of no where all because I got a bruise that he couldn’t remember, because I had a dream about escaping him and with someone who would obviously treat me better then he ever would. He leaned down into my neck, I trembled beneath him, his facial hair tickled my neck and his warm breath made me flustered

“Please don’t do this... I’m sorry for whatever I did. I won’t do it again..” I pleaded through tears but he ignored my pleas and bit into my neck harshly. I screamed in pain, thrashing violently under him again. His hands moving from my wrists to holding my waist and the back of my head, his teeth sunk further into my flesh till the blood was pooling onto the blankets beneath us.

“Why... Why..” I choked out shoving against his chest weakly, his bite stung horribly eventually everything just felt numb and he pulled away. The scent of iron filled my nose making me a little sick.

“I-I knew... you were mentally ill but I really-” I paused choking on a sob in my throat

“-didn’t think you were a fucking lunatic..” I muttered staring up at his bloody face for a reaction but he appeared blank like it didn’t even matter what he had just done. My hands slowly moved up to my neck, flinching a little as I felt the warm and wet wound there after I felt terrible and the world was leaving my sights  


“Is... this your kindness to me... killing me... how sweet.. how cruel.. you squeeze my fragile fleshy... heart..”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I still have no idea how to finish this story and yet here we are chugging along!


	4. Crafty Dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When will you learn not to trust him?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!~

I was in my favorite craft store, it went out of business a couple of years ago. I loved it as a kid, even if they did have ‘absurd prices’ my mom would say. They were celebrating a 25th year anniversary but I don’t remember them being here 25 years. Mark was in my dream again, chatting with some of the guests and honestly I felt uneasy after my previous dream. I tried to reassure myself that my last dream wasn’t real, it was just a nightmare. With a little hesitation I approached him staring at his bright bright smile as he talked, I couldn’t help but feel happy to see him.

“Mark?” I called capturing his gaze, he paused his talking and was now smiling at me 

“Your Markiplier, right?” I asked 

“Yep that’s me.” his smile was phony, I could tell he was a bit uncomfortable

“I use to watch you all the time... but I..” I paused my smile faltered and I averted my eyes 

“Just haven’t been able to..” I muttered, Mark looked kind confused but stiff and uncomfortable

“Ah well sorry I gotta get going soon! It was nice to meet you!” I decided against pestering him

“Ah wait!” He called I looked over my shoulder at him with a bit of wide eyes

“Yes?” I murmured I blinking at him curiously

“They’re having a party in a few minutes.. will you be here for that?” He asked and I couldn’t stop the smiling from spreading across my face

“I don’t know... maybe... I’d like to get home before it gets dark.” I was speaking but kind of thinking out loud to myself, he made an ‘oh’ sound

“Ah well.. I hope you’ll be here anyway.” He waves and I smiled a little wider, waving back with a little joy wielding up in my heart

“We’ll see.” I murmured walking further into the store.

I couldn’t remember why I was in here and what I wanted exactly, this place had been shut down since I was at least 14 years old and when did I shop I always just browsed enjoying the strange supplies they offered, the lovely different scents in the store, the inspiration to do something wonderful.

I decided just to get a sketch book and some normal drawing pencils before heading to the check out. The check out lady seem to remember me but I couldn’t remember her, she’s was friendly and sweet, talking about how cute I was when I was just a little girl coming here with my mom. 

I thanked her and started to leave regardless of Mark’s hopes of me being here, the reality of my life was that I hated party’s and get together’s. Nothing would change that, not even Markiplier himself. I paused looking back toward Mark, I felt the need to at least say goodbye before going home.

“Hi again Mark.” I murmured a little sad I was just here to tell him ‘bye’

“Oh hey.. the celebration’s starting.. you staying?” He asked a little eagerly like a happy puppy in my eyes

“Nah.. sorry I don’t think I’m gonna stay.. it’s getting dark and walking the streets at night alone is a death wish these days.” I said trying to play it off with a chuckle but he frowned looking a tad bit disappointed

“Oh.. well if you wanted I could drive you home after this..” he asked, cautiousness clear in his voice, obviously afraid he would make me uncomfortable 

“you hardly know me.” I said with a small smile, flattered he’d go to the extend of offering me a ride just to get me to stay

“Oh no but I do! You’re my wonderful fan!” He said with a bright smile I couldn’t stop the happiness wedging itself into my heart overlapping my better judgement

“Alright alight! but I don’t wanna be here too long!” I said smiling brightly finally convinced to stay, Mark laughed happily

‘Why did I ever stop watching him?’ I thought quietly.

Because I told you not to.

Staying here was a different choice then want I would’ve liked but Mark had his charming ways of convincing me to stay. the sun set outside, Somewhere the back of my mind I felt a pulling need to get home but it was nothing new just my regular anxiety reminding I’d rather be home than surrounded by strangers.

‘Even in my dreams... my anxiety is there..’

_** Poor little thing ** _

Though I had stayed because of Mark, he was busy chatting it up with some employees and customers who seemed know who he was as well. I felt kind of left out and unneeded, a familiar feeling I knew of, even as a child. It got late and I got impatient fearing the dreadful night

“Mark could you drive me home?” I asked, a little afraid he forgotten about his offer

“Yeah just a moment..” he murmured to me never taking his eyes away from the other people he was talking to. I felt cast out and like I was an annoyance to him. I wandered outside debating whether I should wait or just walk home, I decided on the riskier of the two choices rather than bothering Mark more than I already have.

‘Home wasn’t even that far, it was just it was dark and I was by myself..’ I thought as I began walking across the parking lot onto the sidewalk

“Wait!...” I froze, tensing a little I looked over my shoulder at Mark running at me in full speed “Wait!...” he called again. He got closer and I cringed a tiny bit, half expecting me to crash into me but he stopped a few feet away from me, resting his hands on his knees as he panted loudly

“S-sorry... I was such a jackass in there..” he said through breaths, he stood up straight I blinked a little bit surprised

“It’s okay... I just thought you looked like you were having fun and I shouldn’t bother you.. “ I muttered under my breath and cast my gaze downward

“I mean I was but I’d rather make sure you got home safe.” He confessed his words didn’t help the heavy feeling in my chest, I felt more like a burden now

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay? I’ll be fine! my home isn’t that far anyway.” I tried to my best to convince him but he shook his head

“Nonsense! I can’t have something happen to one of my fans just because I wanted to party!” He chuckled, the feeling in my chest lifted a little

“Okay.. okay.. just remember it’s your own fault when you come back and the party’s over!” I said he smiled

“Who said I was coming back? I gotta get home myself” he told me as I followed him to his car. Mark was so bright and warm, he was like the sun radiating down on me offering me unnecessary kindness and warmth

‘Unlike him...’ the thought struck me in the heart, it hurt deeply

“Is something wrong?” He asked making me realize I was just standing there instead of getting in his car

“Oh... um..” I choked up and cursed myself silently

‘Am I really gonna cry in front of Markiplier?’ I thought bitterly, looking away I quickly covered my face embarrassed completely. 

I felt his arms wrap around me tightly and his touch broke the walls completely, I couldn’t stop the tears from leaking from my eyes

“S-sorry...” I choked out trying to wipe the tears away

“No no it’s okay whatever it is, its okay. Just take this moment and let it out.” He hushed me in a comforting tone. After a moment I pulled back looking up at him through teary eyes

“I’m scared to go home...” I confessed, not telling him the reason.

“Well if you wanted... I could rent you a room at the hotel I’m staying at but only if you were comfortable with that, of corse.” He said, I was shocked he’d go to that extend for me, a random fan 

“I’m not sure what’s happening at your home but if your too scared to go home, you can hang with me for a while but if you wanna go home that’s fine.” 

I started to cry again, his words felt like a bandaid being put on my wounds. I hugged him tightly and he hugged me back

‘He’s still cold..’

“Are you sure you’re okay with this?” I murmured in his shirt he patted my head

“Yeah of corse!” He said smiling, I wanted this moment to last forever but then a shrill and angry voice called out

“Get the fuck away from her!”

I felt sick and my legs trembled, I whipped my head toward Anti. He was standing a good distance away from us

“Anti?” I whispered he was scowling, not at me but Mark

“Jack what are you doing here? I’m here bec-“ Mark begin to explain but Anti cut him off

“Drop the act!" He hissed walking closer, obviously angry with one of us

“What? Jack you okay man?” Mark sounded confused and concerned of his friend but I was straight terrified, Mark ushered me behind him when Anti was in arms reach

“What are you a fucking pedophile now?! Trying to get her into your van and make her come home with you?! What’s next you gonna offer her some candy and tell her your puppy is lost?!” Anti

“Jack...” he paused laughing nervously

“you’re scaring my fan..” he murmured, Anti sighed his eyes moving to me

“She’s not your fan. Not anymore.” Anti hissed and I looked away fearfully 

“Well I really don’t think that’s for you to decide.” Mark retorted, Anti rolled his eyes and in a split second slashed Mark’s throat wide open

“You’re boring me to death with this Markiplier act..” he said bitterly. I cried out in surprise and moved aside watching as Mark fell backwards holding his neck, I tried to help him but Anti yanked me away and held me behind him

“I can’t escape you! Not even in my dreams!” I yelled at him, he shushed me. I notice he seemed to be watching Mark’s corpse intently

“It’s over just cut it out Dark! You can’t hide yourself anymore!” Anti shouted and waited for something to happen but Mark was undoubtedly dead now. After a few moments of nothing Anti laughed, making me jump out of my skin 

“Are you really just gonna let me take her home that easily.. that’s fine..” he whispered turning towards me I whimpered quietly he loomed over me

“We’re going have a chat when we get home..” he told me beginning to drag me away from Marks corpse. Bitter tears left my eyes and I glanced back at Mark

‘I just need to accept my fate, accept the fact I’d never escape Anti..’ I thought bitterly turning away from Mark. A long loud sigh made Anti stop in his tracks, he looked over his shoulder a grin stretching across his face madly

“You know... I really liked this suit...” I looked back again at Mark, who was now standing up and brushing off a suit. He was completely grey unlike before so warm and full of life, he wasn’t Mark. A blue and red outline flicker around him, his neck was still bleeding profusely but rather than looking in pain he looked annoyed

“Here I was really hoping I was just imagining this whole thing and she wasn’t actually being infected by some creep in her dreams..” Anti’s voice cracking in few glitchy tones, Mark chuckled. at this point I was beyond terrified and confused

“Oh she’s infected alright.... she’s infected by your filthy virus.” Mark said bitterly. my mind felt like it was collapsing and I kept telling myself there was no way this was happening

“And that annoys you, doesn’t it? Because most of your precious little fans come home with you with no problems... only to be brainwashed into mindless slaves doomed forever to wander your supposed ‘home’..” Anti mocked 

“At least I have fans and not just the one fan you kidnapped.” Mark commented his gaze landing on me I felt uneasy by his mere gaze

“Shut up!..” Anti yelled but Mark ignored him, his eyes still trained on me when I blinked he was suddenly right next to me, I squeaked in surprise backing further behind anti’s side

“Do you really want to go home with him? I mean it’s only a matter of time before he-“ Anti kicked him back into his car before he could finish the sentence. I looked up at Anti only to gasp and back away from him a little. His glitching was out of control and his neck was bleeding, his eyes were black, his teeth were gridded into a awful snarl

“Go home... now..” Anti growled at me and I didn’t hesitate to began running across the parking lot onto the sidewalk. When I reached the bridge on the way to my home I felt doubt enter my mind

‘If I go home... Anti will hurt me... Anti.... will undoubtedly hurt me.. for trying to leave him..but.. I don’t.. want to leave him.. I’m just scared of him..’ I thought as tears bubbled in my eyes

“Then don’t go.”

I gasped looking up Mark or ‘Dark’ as Anti had called him was standing there somehow ahead of me.

‘Where’s Anti?’ I thought looking back, ready to flee

“He’s back there hallucinating that me and him are fighting..” Dark said, seemingly reading my very thoughts. He moved close reaching toward me I flinched and he stopped 

“I’m not going to hurt you. I never would but can you say the same about Anti?” He told me I frowned looking away for a second. He was grabbed my wrists pulling them out in front of me, I gasped in surprise expecting him to drag me or even to hurt like he had done before but he just held my arms outward

“Look at them.. “ he murmured and I realized he was referring to my arms, blue greens and purples faded in and out, I tried to tug away

“So many.. how long?” He asked, I was crying and shaking my head, trying to get away from him

“It’s alright.. you don’t have to be afraid..” his voice lacked confront, he tugged me towards him and hugged me like before 

‘he feels colder now.’

“You can come home with me... you’ll be safe...” he sounded desperate still trying to convince me again. Even if he was being honest, I didn’t plan on leaving Anti even if he was going to hurt me when I got home.

“Mark I really appreciate your offer and I’d like to... but I won’t leave Anti alone..” I confessed aloud 

His hug turned painful and all I could do was struggle in his grasp. I struggled an arm free and reached up sticking my hand against the wound on his neck, he hissed releasing me, I stumbled to my feet before I ran towards my home

“ Why ?” He called his voice echoing all around me, the bridge was suddenly too long and never ending, I kept running but I felt like I was getting no where

“He’s going to hurt you when you get home, don’t you get it? Why are you trying so hard to get home? There’s no happiness to return to..” his voice was pounding in my mind

“I know... and it’s okay... he can take it out on me..” I muttered unsure if he could hear me

“Is it though? Let me paint you a pretty picture then.” He sounded angry and the never ending bridge came to a stop, I fell forward.

_ I whined looking up I realized I was back in Sean’s home but not mine. _

__

_ “How could you?!” Sean was suddenly there grabbing me up by hair I yelped, grasping at his wrist _

__

_ “I’ve had it.. you tried to leave with him! I know you did!” He hissed bringing me closer to his snarling face. He reminded me of a barking dog, viscous, loud and intimidating. _

__

_ “I didn’t though... I wanted to come home to you..” I murmured through tears, he growled throwing me onto my bed, I tried to get back up but he was already pinning me against it. _

__

_ “Stop lying!” He yelled gripping my neck enough for my breathing to become raggedy _

__

_ “You’ve tried to leave me before what’s so different now? Well what is it?!.” He asked me and I knew the answer _

__

_ “I sought help..” I whispered, he loosened his grip on my neck I looked back up at him and flinched as he leaned in next to my ear _

__

_ “You did and that’s not aloud.. now I’m going to have to punish you..” he whispered then he nibble my ear I gasped _

__

_ “N-no wait don’t do this!” I cried shoving against his chest he growled lowly moving further down to my neck he nibbled the sensitive flesh there and I couldn’t stop the gasp escaping my mouth _

__

_ “You see.. you know you want this..” he whispered his hand moving up my shirt I hide my face sobbing beneath him _

__

_ “Anything but this...” I whimpered feeling his hands rom my body and his warm breath sent a tingling sensation through out my body _

__

_ “Pretty little doll..” he whispered his fingers tugging at the hem of my pants, a sob escaped me when he tore them down along with my panties. His fingers already playing with the mass of nerves between my legs _

_ My mind became foggy with pleasure, nothing felt like it mattered anymore. Anti was still nibbling my neck, leaving marks there, claiming me in his own sadistic way. He begin fiddling with his pants and a familiar panicked sensation over rid the pleasure in my body. _

_ I tried to move but my body was frozen, some kind of force held me there and watch as anti rubbed his tip up and down my slit. He pushed in, I cried out feeling a sting and a dull pain form in my nether regions.  _

_ Anti was breathing heavily and hushing me with incoherent words I didn’t want to hear. He kissed me suddenly and begin moving in and out of me without any consideration of the pain I was feeling. _

_ His tongue forced its way into my mouth muffling my whimpers of pain. His thrusts were rough and painful but after awhile the pleasure I had been feeling returned. All my nerves were tingling, the sensation between my legs was building and building till it snapped. I cried out clinching around him as I rod out my first orgasm _

_ Anti chuckled at me through his panting, his thrust growing sloppy and I could feel his shaft twitch before he groaned, filling me with his seed. My tears returned, I covered my face, shame filling my body, I felt gross and dirty. Anti kissed me again, whimpers escaping me _

_ “You wanted this...”  _

his voice trailed off, the hallucination coming to abruptly yet much desired end. A yell pulled me from my daze and screams of pain torn through the air. Anti was standing over Dark, stomping his face in. I cringed watching the blood splattered everywhere.

“You sick bastard!” Anti screeched, glitching as he did. Slowly I stood from my spot on the ground, contemplating on running home.

“It was mistake! And I’m never going to do it again!” He yelled at this point Dark’s head was mush and I felt sickened by the sight. Anti finally stopped and looked at me, I flinched at his gaze still a tiny bit afraid he might do something to me.

“Lets go home..” he whispered, I nodded softly and waited for him to catch up to my side before beginning to walk across the bridge. I glanced back at Dark, feeling a little sad he wasn’t who I wanted him to be.

We reached my home and walked up the front porch, at this point I was terrified and shaking violently. I approached the door but stopped unable to find the strength to open it, Sean touched my shoulder

“I am not going to hurt you.” He assured me with a hug me

“I have so much to explain to you but I can’t do it here... he might come back..” he let me go and I exhaled, calming myself before moving back to the door, I turned the knob and went inside.


	5. Rules

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rule are rules but his were just insane.

My eyes shot open I tried to sit up but something heavy stopped me, for a split second I thought Anti had confined me but after I realized it was too warm, the lump in front of me was not in fact blankets but Anti sleeping soundly.

I became both flustered and terrified by Anti holding me, especially knowing he could wake up at any given moment didn’t help the panic in my body. I didn’t even know if he’d still be feral and try to finish what he started, if anything I had no idea how his mood would be.

My neck was still bleeding but not as much as it was when he bit it. I was regretting it already but I needed to get up and take care of the wound otherwise I might just bleed out under Anti. 

I let out a quiet sigh and tried to relax. As gentle as possible I lifted one of his arm holding me and tried to slid out from under him. He sighed and tightened his arm around me again, crushing me against his chest. I squeaked quietly,I was frozen afraid he’d wake up. my breath hitched and I tried to relax again but everything in my mind was beginning to panic 

He groaned and turned over taking me with him. At this point I was dying inside, ready burst out screaming and crying, probably both. He rubbed his eyes, I tensed horribly, he started to wake up. I shut my eyes tightly, trying to pretend to be asleep. 

“It’s okay... you don’t have to be scared. “ he murmured, I flinched feeling him petted my head. I opened my eyes and stared up at him in fear and despite having a million questions, I couldn’t bring myself to speak at all. I could only think about his feral like state, determined to bite me.

“what I did was probably beyond bizarre to you.. I never wanted to do it but I had to do it to protect you.” he begins to explain and I listened intently, not wanting to upset him with every question in my mind. 

“I know... I know it’s hard to believe..” he pauses looking doubtful in his face, he moved his hand from atop my head to my cheek

“Mark is infected by a mysterious entity. Two people named Damien and Celine have rotted Mark hollow and if anything Mark doesn’t exist anymore.” he little sad when telling me but I couldn’t believe anything he had just said, it just felt like he was being straight up insane or manipulating me in some weird way

“Anyone that is Mark’s fan is always in endanger of their minds being taken away to his ‘home’. If you go to his home you become his, you have no will, no thoughts, you’re just hollow. You’re not yourself anymore.” He explains, I feel nothing but dread building in me, fearing he finally lost his mind.

“Now Mark’s fans are usually marked to let him know they need to come home and normally he seeks them out in their dreams posing as Markiplier to convince them with a bright and friendly smile to come home with him and why would they refuse? It’s just Markiplier but it isn’t! It’s a dream demon wearing his face!” 

‘It was just a dream. I care about him so much and I can’t handle losing him like this but if I refuse to accept this fabricated reality he’ll just end up hurting me over and over again..’

His eyes pull me from my thoughts. they remained locked onto me as he rolls over me, I’m beneath him now. He places a hand next to my head softly pinning me beneath him

“The reason I bit you was to infect you...” he confesses, his hand running over the bite mark, chills erupted over my body fear instilling itself into my body again 

“I did it to invade your dreams... to save you from him.” he whispered closing the distance between me and him, his lips hovered above mine. I shut my eyes, flinching horribly I waited for him to kiss me or move away 

“But now... Mark, Damien, Celine whoever they are have their eyes on you.. because you refused to go home with him because you already have a home.. with me..” he whispered I was squeezing my eyes closed, too afraid of what he might do, what to hope for.

“You were such a good girl. You didn’t get in his car and you didn’t accept his offer. You went back to our home..” he praised me all well I felt like I dying beneath him. I felt him pull back enough for me to relax a little. 

I peered my eyes open again and he was smiling to my surprise, but it wasn’t a creepy a smile, it was gentle and full of warmth. something I wasn’t use to, something I lost the right to.

“Come on now. let’s go patch up your neck.” he sat up and offered me a hand, I took his and let him lead me to the bathroom.

I couldn’t help but feel nervous that this was just a act or a trap and Anti was still planning on punishing me. He gently wiped the blood off with a wet rag before wrapping the wound in gauze. 

“I am proud of you. however there is one rule you must follow after today.” His voice losing its warmth turning more serious, yet somehow I felt more annoyance than fear

‘what is it Anti? Am I no longer able to breath without permission? I’m already confined and gagged by him. What else could he possibly forbid?’ 

“You can’t sleep anymore.” He stated. shock washed over my face “What?” I asked staring in disbelief, Anti sighed quietly 

“If you go to sleep Dark will surely come after you again. I infected you, you shouldn’t feel the need to sleep.” He said

“Anti... I cannot believe Mark is some psycho trying to lure his fans away..” I confessed, Sean sighed again, obviously annoyed with my answer 

“I was in your dream... you were at the craft market from when you were 14 years old and Mark was there trying to convince you to come home with him. you almost got into his pedo van but then I showed up and showed his true nature.” He told me my exact dream and it did nothing but send me into a panic attack.

‘How did he know? Was he really there?... Mark must hate me now... right?’ My breathing turned rapid and my body shook uncontrollably 

“Are you okay?” 

‘Why did Mark want me to come home?’ Tears flooded my eyes and crept down my face 

“No no it’s okay don’t cry!”

‘Would he really make me hollow?’ I hid my face in my hand feeling myself fade from reality 

“It will be alright! I swear I’ll protect you.. I won’t let him remind you!” 

‘Maybe that would be better than this? Should I run? Should I run? Should I go home?’ My heartbeat evened out slowly and my mind cleared itself 

“Please...” 

‘But if you run, you’ll leave Anti behind..’ I shook off the thoughts and realized Anti was holding me tightly, tears still dripping off my chin 

“It’s alright..” he murmured, petting my head softly 

“Nothing, nothing is alright Anti.. Mark.. poor Mark... he must be so lonely to want all these people..” I whispered, Anti tensed and looked visible upset that I’d even think that way after all Dark had done.

“I’m afraid he’s not mark anymore... he takes on the name Dark.. despite having 3 different things controlling him.” Anti tells me but somewhere in my mind I denied it, it was too hard to accept that Markiplier was gone and just some psycho remained, turning his fans into mindless slaves.

“I’m sorry.. I know it’s hard to accept but that’s just how it is.” He paused sighing, looking a tad tired 

“Unfortunately I have to go and record some videos. I’ll check on you in between sessions.” Anti pulled back. I frowned a little and nodded, feeling like a puppy being left home alone whilst their master went to work.

-

The first and second day I was fine, I didn’t feel tired at all but by the fourth day I was exhausted. I could hardly bring myself to keep my eye lids open, Anti insisted I stay awake and kept promising it would get better but it felt like it was getting worse by the second.

I took a cold shower in a attempt to wake myself up, nothing seem to work. I got dressed and sat at my desk fighting the tiredness once again, at this rate I was going to go insane. I felt the world spin, I slumped over my desk still fighting despite feeling my eyes lids slid shut 

“Hey.. hey!” I jumped at Anti’s voice I felt him pat my back, I jolted back up to my feet 

“S-sorry! Sorry!” I shout a little loudly, he sighed and sat some coffee in front of me

“Listen I just have to go make a vlog about taking a short break after that we’ll get this sorted out. Just give me five minutes okay?” He said I nodded, he patted my head 

“I’ll be back in a moment. Drink your coffee!” He commanded. I rolled my eyes and blew on my coffee before taking a sip but gagged, Anti hadn’t put any cream or sugar in it ‘he knew I loved my sugar’ I thought

I made my way down stairs and begin searching the cabinets for the sugar and creamer. I spotted the sugar but creamer was still in hiding. I stopped in my search holding my head, the room spun around me, my knees gave out and everything blacked out

‘When will you let me go?’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah! you gotta love the cliche waking up in bed with them holding you like a teddy bear.


	6. Deeper

Anti had just finished recording a short video about him taking a break for a week or so, making an excuse about being too stressed but in reality he wanted to solely focus on ‘ fixing’ her. He was worrying the infection he injected her with was failing to take over

He finished editing the video, the upload would take 20 minutes in the mean time he went back to check on her. She wasn’t in her room, he wandered to the kitchen and his blood went cold, there she laid on the kitchen floor, the exhaustion finally taking its toll on her

“No... no no no!” He yells falling to his knees besides her, he held her up slightly, patting her face he shook her violently 

“Hey! Hey!.. wake up!“ he yells again but she didn’t respond, he grids his teeth holding her tightly. He feels a surge of angry and sadness in himself. He exhaled and thought quietly to himself

“Please don’t leave me...” he whispers resting his forehead against her head

“I infected you... you shouldn’t have never been tired again. you should have been... like me...” he murmured tugging at her shirt collar till he could see the bruise from Dark, The bruise had spread across her upper back, her upper arm, as well as a bit of her chest.

“Please don’t go..... don’t go with him..” he murmurs against her flesh, biting the bruise harshly. He followed her into her dreams trying to find her again.

-

I was in a bar to my surprise, I was over 21 but I had never tried drinking so I was lead to wonder why I was in a bar in the first place. It was quiet, mostly empty aside from a group of guys and a couple on the opposite sides of the room. I was seated at the bar but there was no sign of a bartender.

I already felt sick as if I had been drinking already but I had no memory of doing so. I laid my head on the bar counter, tired and confuse I really didn’t want to be here but I didn’t want to go home either, that place just held bad memories for me.

A male voice broke me from thought “Here on the house.” They said, sitting a drink in front of me. I could see some legs dressed in black pants walk away, I assumed it was the bartender and didn’t have any other thought than

‘I’m not having that...’.

After awhile of just sitting in the bar, stuck in my own mind and afraid to go home I gave into the alcoholic drink, It tasted horrible but seem to num my thoughts. I didn’t remember much after that, I remember that group of guys pushing me to let them drive me home and the bartender took me instead.

Waking up was a pain. Everything was just a bit too bright and painful to look at, my head felt equal to being hit with a hammer. Was this a hangover? I wasn’t sure. I sat up, nothing I was in a bed with a fluffy blanket, it wasn’t my own. 

The room was considerably tidy and had a desk with a computer on it, a bookshelf, and a end table next to the bed. Before I got a chance to get out of bed the door opened. My face paled and my breath hitched, I didn’t know why. The man known I knew as Markiplier, a YouTuber stood there.

‘Shouldn’t I be happy?’ I thought staring surprised, he chuckled a little shyly

“I take it you know me?” He murmured, I composed myself and shook my head 

“N-no.. actually... you looked like.. someone I know..” I murmured back, he blinked a few times then came over with some water and aspirin

“This will help.” He handed me both items and I took them hesitantly

‘Why? I can’t remember... I just know something is wrong.’ I took the aspirin and drank the water swallowing it down before meeting his eye again

“What is your name?” I asked trying to smile a little despite the bad feeling in my gut

“Mark. I’m Mark..” he murmured, I worked on my smile but it was faltering

‘ ~~ _It’s Dark..._~~ ’ I tensed at the voice in my head

“Nice to meet you..” I said holding out my hand, he shook it briefly 

‘ ~~_You need to run_ ~~.’

I felt my throat dry. I knew the voice was right I could feel it, that silent need to get away from this man even if he was Markiplier something wasn’t right.

“Oh no!... What time is it?” I blurted, looking around rapidly

“Uh.. it’s “ he paused looking at his watch

“12:39. Why do want to know?” His face held confusion 

“Shit.... I need to get home I have a appointment at 1:00... shoot..” I murmured getting up quickly but I knew by the look on Mark’s face he didn’t believe my act at all. I tried to leave the room but he slammed an arm in the door way making me jump a little

“Let me drive you..” he said smiling a tad creepily

“No that’s okay. Thanks anyway.” I said sliding under his arm but he wrapped a arm around my neck harshly

“Most.. would die to stay in my home... but... but you are quite the exception.. “ he hissed in my ear, I struggled clawing at his arm

“let me go!” I hissed and he chuckled once again, he kept a grip on my neck with but his arm released and made me spin around to face him.

I flinched at the sight of his familiar greyed out body and it’s 3D outline. The expression he had reminded her of a displeased father but I hardly knew him and couldn’t understand why he looked so angry and disappointed.

“Normally you all just wake up, ready to serve... ready to listen... normally you don’t even want to run.” he hissed pulling me up close and personal 

“In all honesty I’ve never had to try so hard to make someone mine..” 

I struggled against him, pushing at his face but he laughed grabbing my wrist, this time his touch psychically hurt and left a mark much like the one on my shoulder. 

“you must be so lucky to have captured my full attention.” 

I fell to my knees. I felt beyond tired, I tried to stand up but the world was wobbly. Dark let go of my wrist letting me fall to my side, he crouched to me smiling widely

“Don’t worry... I’ll make you feel right at home..” he murmured petting my head. My arms gave out under me and the darkness took over

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two infections, one mind. Which will win?


	7. Not Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You remember some of your past.

I woke up again, this time in a snow covered forest. I was cold, alone, and confused ofhow I ended up here or even who I was for that matter. I was lost and felt like I was missing someone, someone I had forgotten or didn’t want to remember. 

some you had to drown in the blood you spilled.

I wandered the seemingly endless forest, I finally came upon a abandoned looking house. To me at least, it was bizarre finding a house in the middle of a forest but I couldn’t question it now, not when I was freezing my ass off.

Heading inside I was hoping for warmth but the house had been long abandoned and held little warmth in it thin walls. My head throbbed and I begin remember something I never had but craved it, laughter but it wasn’t frightening like Anti’s it was familiar to me.

My mouth opened automatically to call a name but it came out incoherent to me despite me being the one who had said it. I heard a door open and the rush of foot steps followed the sound, I jumped out of my skin and turned watching someone come rushing up to me

“Your home!” A girls voice announced, I stared beyond confused at the scribbles covering her face, I couldn’t see her, couldn’t recognize anything about her and yet she seem to know me

“I never thought you’d return! After all this time!” She hugged me tightly but I didn’t know how to react, I thought maybe I was seeing things but the scribbles remained on her no matter how many times I blinked. She pulled back now looking a little sad

“You don’t remember do you? It’s me *****..” I couldn’t hear her name, I shook my head softly

“I’m sorry... I don’t know you..” I murmured, she lowered her head and sighed looking sad

“I know... I know... I was really hoping we wouldn’t have to do this the hard way.” she stepped back and brought her head back up laughing loudly, the scribbles were gone but I was still confused. It was me.

“OH WELL!” She yelled and grabbed me by my hair I pulled back but she had already yanked me back and down against the floor sitting on my chest. I struggled, she just laughed at me and my feeble attempts.

She reached up into her eye sockets and yanked out her own eyes, I was screaming at this point. she grinned down at me with ill intentions. She pushed his fingers into my eyes all I could do was scream and claw violently at her wrists till I couldn’t see anymore.

“You’re going to remember.. you are going to see what we did.. what you dumped on me!” She hissed against my ear, I felt her pressing something against my empty sockets and a stinging sensation bloomed into my face. 

I could see again but I wasn’t in that home anymore but another home, a bigger home and I felt like I belonged here but the same time I felt like I didn’t have my right to be here.

“****! There you are! I’m making dinner come talk to me!” A older woman is in view, a warm yellow light illuminates the kitchen

‘Don’t call me that... I don’t deserve your smile..’ a thought forces itself into my mind. 

I stand with her, she talks happily about something but I’m not listening but I can’t stand it, this all wrong I didn’t deserve to be here. Not after what I did.

“****! Come here a second and look at this!”

A male voice calls me I follow it to a bedroom, a guy a little older than me is sitting in recliner playing a video game. He talks excitedly about something but again I can’t listen to them. I leave into the living room, sighing as I rested my face in my hands.

“Aw.. what’s wrong? Aren’t you happy? We’re finally home!” The other me from earlier is behind me holding my shoulders firmly

“I don’t think this is right..” I murmured, she hums then snaps her fingers

“You’re right! This living room was reek of death when we left it!” She exclaims before covering my eyes

“3... 2... 1 surprise!”

She uncovered my eyes only to reveal those people hanging from the ceiling, their intestines decorating the room like party streamers, their remaining organs were piled below them.

I couldn’t breath everything felt cold again. Their faces had smiles painted on them but they were no longer warm and happy as before. I could remember it now, they were my family

“Mom... I’m sorry..” I choked out, feeling the tears spill out of my eyes. The other me giggled behind me

“So you do remember!” She says but I couldn’t find the words to reply

“Or do you? Do you? Tell me why we did it.” She asks eagerly awaiting an answer, I lowered my head from the sight of my family

“Because... everything ends and everything stops.. they stopped being happy... and I wanted them to be happy forever... I didn’t want to lose them..” I murmured through my tears

“That’s right! Very good! You were selfish!” She bonked me on the head, I flinched wincing quietly. She snaked a arm around my neck looking into my eyes with a quiet glare

“You were really selfish... you dumped it on me and refused to take back our burden... you made me simply so you wouldn’t remember!” She hissed, tightening her grip I pushed against her

“I couldn’t do it! I couldn’t bare it! I’m sorry!” I cried, she growled shoving my head against the wall she held my wrists harshly

“Your sorry?! I had to endure this night over and over again!” She screamed her hands moving to my neck choking me as tried to pry her hands off my neck

“I had to remember your obsessive humming as you dug out our family’s organs and hung them up I had to remember you painting the walls with their blood! And all you can say is sorry?!” She screams crushing my neck, I wheezed tears spewing out of my eyes

“Y-you’re right!...” I choked, she loosened her grip enough for me to speak

“What?” She murmured 

“You’re right... this isn’t fair.. what I did to you..” I choked out 

“I’ll stay here... and live threw... this.. you can go.. Go and have fun and I’ll accept this purgatory in your stead..” I murmured her expression fell flat as well as her grip letting me drop to the floor

“Enjoy your stay.” She hissed before disappearing.

-

“Oh Jack! buddy your a little late!” Dark called Anti hazily looked around, confusion masking his features before refocusing on Dark

“Where is she?” Anti growled

“Sleeping.. you shouldn’t wake her otherwise she might not be how you remember her~” he threatens, Anti snarls a little and his body begins fidgeting with various glitches 

“I don’t believe you.”

Dark just chuckled watching Anti’s eyes became solid black, he growled allowing the angry to take over and the glitches becoming overwhelming 

“You already this mad?” Dark mocked 

“You lose control over simplistic things! Anti when will you learn?!” Dark continued his mockery, Anti pounced at him with a full set of razor sharp teeth gaping open. He torn at him but Dark held him back by his wrists

“Your not as strong as me Anti!” Dark said throwing him back against the wall but Anti shook it off and clawed at him again, glitching behind him to slash his back wide open, Dark made a noise of annoyance before he swatted him backwards, Sean slid backward but remained on his feet

“Anti?...”

Dark and Anti snapped their heads toward her standing in the door way, Dark was obviously more confused than anti was. She was awake, she should have been sleeping for a year at least

“You need to go home now!” Anti yelled with his glitches mimicking him, she flinched at his appearance and tone of voice 

“How are you still here?” Dark murmured stepping closer to her but Anti yanked him back, Dark just shrugged him off. He was determined to get her again, Dark reached toward her and she backed up

“You’re not getting her!” Anti pounced on Dark back, clawing at his neck. Dark yanked him forward under his foot stomping his face in 

“How do you like getting you’re face stomped?!” Dark yelled, she gasped flinching covering her eyes. Dark sighed and composed himself before moving towards her again. She backed away and tried to run but he grabbed her wrist roughly, examining where he had marked her, only to find it gone.

“I’m going to have to infect you again but this time I won’t be so nice...” Dark threatens, she trembled unable to form words backing up further, Dark following her each step closer she felt frightened to the core

“P-please... I..” she whimpered, he rolled his eyes

“Oh please what? Don’t hurt me! Don’t do this! Wah wah!” He mocked, her briefly before his hand shot out and grabbed her face transferring the infection to her once again. For a minute she didn’t move, her arms fell back to her sides then she just laughed, he lowered his hand from her face she was smiling widely, her eyes devoid of life and yet this wasn’t his infection, his infection made them blank, his infection would take the life out of them. Not this!

“You look fun...” she moves forward her arms wrapping around his shoulders, he froze unable to process the sudden change in her attitude, it wasn’t Anti’s doing either. It was someone else entirely yet they had the same face as her.

“What’s the matter? You had so much to say before...” she murmurs her nails digging into his shoulders and another sliding up his chest, Dark felt dread building in his gut

“Will you hurt me?” She asked her smile is disgustingly pretty and her movements mimicked it. She wasn’t who he sought anymore, she was someone much worse, someone much darker and honestly he loved and hated it, mostly because he wanted to be the one to corrupt the innocence in her but someone had obviously beaten him to.

“Hey... are you listening? I asked you question..” she sounded annoyed

“That depends... will you come home with me?” He asked, she hummed tapping her lips 

“Will you hurt me then? Will you remind me of all my sins?” She sounded more like she begging than asking another question

“If that is what you seek then I would gladly oblige you.” He cups her cheek and she giggled

“ Then let’s go .”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I imagine the reader’s mind is cracked in half, trying its best to suppress the bad memories.


	8. Found

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He has to be lying right? He’s done this so many times now.

_ ‘It’s so cold... I don’t think I can stand it no longer..’ I thought wandering blindly through a blizzard. I abandoned the home I had destroyed, the home I had turned into a slaughter house. _

_   
_ _ ‘I want to go home... but... it’s too painful.. it’s too sad.. it’s too cold.. and lonely now because of my selfishness..’ I thought stopping, I felt my knees give out and my body following. I felt like death, the snow surrounded me in a cold embrace, it’s cruel white flakes fluttered onto my num body and there I stayed, making the snowy valley my bitter grave. _

__

_ “You know there are warmer places to sleep than out here but I won’t judge.” _

__

_ My eyes cracked open looking above me, there stood Dark holding a lantern staring down at me _

__

_ “H-how... how are you here?” I hissed, he looked a bit confused _

__

_ “I live here? In a cabin with my friend, just over there a ways..” he pointed in a random direction, I couldn’t think straight and I couldn’t comprehend why of all people was he here again trying to make me into some mindless slave. _

__

_ “Anyway come on.. I’ll take you there. You can warm up and wait till the blizzard passes..” he held a hand down to me _

__

_ “D-do I look stupid... you’ve done this trick over 3 times now..” I hissed and tried to sit up but my limbs didn’t cooperate, he laughed nervously _

__

_ “You must a little delirious..” he murmured grabbing my forearm _

__

_ “No.. I’m not.. just leave me alone..” I hissed under my breath, trying to shake him off _

__

_ “Do I look stupid? You know what don’t answer that! But I’m not just leave you out here waiting to freeze your little tocus off!” He said finally fed up with me, he grabbed me up and haled me onto his back _

__

_ “Just hold on... when you warm up you can yell at me all you like..” he murmured I sighed accepting it. I held onto his waist weakly and realized something about him, he was warm, not like how he was before.  _

_ A few minutes pasted and I was now sitting in front of a fireplace wrapped in a blanket, I sat up slightly and looked over my shoulder to spot Dark sitting at a table, he was playing cards by himself I think. _

__

_ “Where am I?” I asked, he tensed and looked toward me, he looked kind of relieved to be honest _

__

_ “Ah good your awake. I thought you might be in a coma or something.” He walked over to me _

__

_ “You didn’t answer my question.” I said a bit coldly, he frowned a little _

__

_ “I’m not sure entirely myself to be honest...” I sighed _

__

_ “Dark this isn’t funny !” I hissed, ready to take his head clean off but I noticed how confused he looked  _

__

_ “My name isn’t Dark.. it’s Mark... “ he whispered raising his hands in defense, I rolled my eyes _

__

_ “Okay.. okay yeah sure.. and I didn’t murder my entire family just so I wouldn’t be alone! Cut the bullshit Dark!” I yelled again, getting up in his face. He cleared his throat nervously _

__

_ “Okay.. um I know this isn’t the best start.. but Hi my name is Mark... I kind think you have me mistaken for someone else..” he murmured, all I could do was stare in disbelief _

__

_ “You’re... not.. him?” I mumbled gridding my teeth, a frustrated sigh escaped me again _

__

_ “Do I really look that stupid to you? To fall for that act over and over again..” I paused wiping the tears in my eyes  _

__

_ “Only to have you betray me... to just use me for your own purposes.. we’ll I won’t fall for it again..” I whispered, he was tense looking, and was giving me a look like I was crazy. I hated it _

__

_ “I.. I don’t mean to be full of it.. but I’m not who you think I am... I am know by Markiplier I’m a famous YouTuber. I got sick awhile back and went to bed when I woke up I found myself here with a lady by the name of Celine I’ve been here for almost 4 months now and I have never met you in my entire life, so if for some odd reason I can’t remember you, I’m so sorry for whatever stupid thing I did.” he spoke fast and nervously.  _

_ He sounded just like Mark but he’s done this many times before and each time resulted in him hurting me _

__

_ “Can I leave?” I asked, he looked a bit surprised _

__

_ “I mean yes... it’s a blizzard out there but I won’t stop you if that’s what you really want..” he said, I stared intently into his eyes searching for lies _

__

_ “So you don’t mind if I leave this place and return to my home?” I asked, he blinked looking more confused by the second _

__

_ “No I don’t. If you can get there safely and know where your going I’m fine if you want to leave.”  _

_ I relaxed a little, I felt tears forming in my eyes. I was tired and wanted to believe this was actually Mark, I didn’t care anymore if it was Dark, just for him to pretend to be loving and caring was enough to drive me forward. _

__

_ My tears rolled down my face, I quietly tried to turn away and wipe them but Mark had already wrapped his arms around me tightly even after I made zero sense to him and basically threatened him and claimed to be a murder, He still hugged me regardless of those things. _

__

_ ‘He’s warm... not like Dark... not like before..’  _

_ I accepted him for who he claimed to be but somewhere in my mind I still worried that he might just be tricking me again. _

__

_ “Mark I-I’m sorry...” I murmured, he didn’t say anything _

__

_ “I know you don’t understand but... Dark.. has pretended to be you so many times, he looks just like you... I know you... I’m your fan.. but..” I paused thinking of him betraying me again, the thought hurt my heart _

__

_ “I don’t know who this Dark is and how he managed to trick you into thinking he’s me... he sounds like he hurt you and for that I am sorry..” he murmured before pulling back gently I felt the tear flow harder _

__

_ “Oh crap.. sorry..” he spat hugging me again tighter _

__

_ “Don’t cry.. I’m sorry..” he whispered, I laughed and pulled back looking up at him _

__

_ “If your faking it I will string you up with the rest of my family...” I said half joking half serious, he paled slightly _

__

_ “Okay.. okay.. whatever you say..” he murmured laughing nervously _

__

_ “Sorry but I just can’t handle being... taken away again and as much I don’t want to.. I need to go home..” I mumbled toward the end, Mark looked concerned _

__

_ “The blizzard should die down by tonight.. so for your sake please wait till then.” He asks I’m hesitant but agree _

__

_ “As soon it dies down I’m out of here.” I state he nods _

__

_ “Alright that’s fine.”  _

_ - _

_ We played uno well waiting for the blizzard to past. It was fun and made me take my thoughts on my current circumstances. Moments felt hours, deep down I was still afraid this would end badly. Just when I was about with the door slammed open. _

__

_ a woman I don’t recognize is standing holding the ears of a well sized dead rabbit, I can’t help but feel a tiny bit sad for the small creature _

_ “Mark I got dinner-...” her voice trails off when her eyes land on me, she looks a little mad _

__

_ “Who is this? Mark what did I say about letting strangers in.” she hissed quietly sounding like a mother scolding her child for letting friends over without permission. _

__

_ “Celine-“ I cut Mark off “I’m not staying. You don’t have to worry, I’m just waiting for the blizzard to past.” I told with a straight face _

__

_ “I hope not. Why did you bring her here anyway Mark?” Celine spat obviously a little bent out of sorts, I felt a tiny pang of annoyance but cast it off. _

__

_ “She was going to freeze to death out there if I didn’t!” Mark defended himself  _

__

_ “I didn’t even want to go with him because I thought he was someone else..” I murmured noticing Celine’s eyes went wide when I said this _

__

_ “Oh.. well just don’t get comfortable..” she seem to quiet down _

__

_ “I don’t plan on it.. I have to get back home back to Anti and Dark..” I mumbled looking out the window at the raging blizzard  _

__

_ “I know it’s a strange question... but does this Dark happen to look like Mark?” She asked, a little worry in her voice  _

__

_ “He looks like Mark’s long lost twin..” I said glancing at her, I noticed she looked more stressed than when she first came in _

__

_ “You know this Dark guy, Celine?” Mark sounded a bit surprised _

__

_ “You could say that... how do you know Damien?” She asked me _

__

_ “He came to me in my dreams, trying to convince me to come home with him... by all means. Now I have to go home, to my own home. That’s all I know now.” I felt sad, maybe homesick even if my home was a really my torture chambers I still missed it regardless _

__

_ “So you guys wanna play uno?” Mark asked suddenly, Celine looked annoyed  _

__

_ “Oh god... not again.” I uttered quietly. _

_ - _

__

_ After a few hours of playing with the two, I notice the blizzard fade into a sprinkle of snow, my queue to leave. I stood up, Mark looked a little sad and Celine didn’t look like she cared much _

__

_ “I need to go now. it’s been fun but I need to go.... home.” I whispered moving toward the door _

__

_ “Wait! Can I walk you there?” Mark asked a bit desperate sounding _

__

_ “Mark...” Celine said in a low warning tone _

__

_ “Oh Celine.. come on! There are wolves this time of night besides it’s my turn to scout anyway..” Mark whined sounding like he was begging his mom to let him go play with his friends _

__

_ “Fine, whatever.” Celine muttered under her breath. _

__

_ In reality I wasn’t too found of having Mark walk me home hence all the times before when Dark tried to kidnap me but I wanted to believe this was Mark, he was leading me home after all.  _

_ The trees were tall black silhouette’s against the darkening blue sky, it reminded me of the ones near my home. Mark was quiet which obviously made we worry he was actually lying before and now shifting into Dark mode. _

__

_ “Did you really kill your family?” He blurted, I felt shame roll over me _

__

_ “Yes. I was selfish, I wanted to have them forever....” I murmured, casting my eyes to the ground _

__

_ “Were they mean to you?” He asked, I shook my head _

__

_ “No. they were perfect, nice, sweet and warm.. like you..” I mumbled toward the end, Mark made a noise of flattery _

__

_ “Hmm didn’t quite catch that last part..” he said, I rolled my eyes _

__

_ “Then I guess you never will..” I nudged his side and he laughed softly _

__

_ “Just please don’t string me up when we get to your home.” He said, I smiled widely _

__

_ “No promises. You’re pretty sweet.” I jokingly replied, he made a mean face _

__

_ “No! I’m bad mean man ugh!” He said in a tough caveman like voice, I laughed loudly at him _

__

_ “Uh huh sure caveman..” I snorted wiping the tears from my eyes _

_ Mark chuckled and begin telling me about one of his regrets, I spotted my real home in the distance and froze on the spot. My lungs felt like they were going to collapse, Mark was still talking to me but it was incoherent. My heart felt like it would explode out of my chest, my legs felt like jello and my stomach twisted in pain. _

__

_ “Hey!” His voice snapped me out of it _

__

_ “It’s alright! it’s okay!” he called, hugging me softly. I hesitated before returning the hug _

__

_ “I’m afraid to go home... to see the mess I’ve made... to see him again..” I murmured _

__

_ “Well sometimes you just gotta do things afraid and it may not seem like it but you will get through it” He told me, rubbing circles on my back, soothing my anxiety’s. I clung to him for a moment his words struck me deeply because they were not like before when Dark he told I didn’t have to go home. _

__

_ “Thank you.” I whispered pulling away, my eyes refocusing on my home. The closer we got, the more and more dreadful I felt. We were standing on my porch, in front of the door. I turned towards Mark with a bit of a sad smile. _

__

_ “You can go now... I don’t.. I don’t want you to see this..” I murmured, he patted my head looking a little conflicted as well _

__

_ “If that’s what you want.... be safe.” He turned away and begin leaving down the steps, I felt sadness watching him go _

__

_ ‘Of corse that’s not what I want..’ I thought turning toward the door I stepped inside.  _

_ The smell of iron was strong and almost unbearable. I walked further inside, closing the door behind me. Tears filled my eyes at the sight of my family hanging from the ceiling _

__

_ ‘Why did I do it? Why? Why? Why?!’ I thought. Sobs escaped me, I fell to my knees, fully breaking down. Light from outside illuminate the living room again, I snapped my head back staring up at Mark in pure horror _

__

_ “So you weren’t lying..” Mark mumbled. I stood quickly, trying to push him back out the door. _

__

_ “Mark what the fuck?! D-don’t look!” I cried obviously ashamed of it, Mark looked shocked but didn’t say anything  _

__

_ “I killed them.. I killed my family a-and the last person I want to see that is you!” I cried breaking down into a sobbing mess once again, Mark hugged me despite knowing I did this _

__

_ “Then why aren’t you covered in blood?” His words hit me like a fist. He was right, This was my memory I should be covered in blood. I pulled back staring at him wide eyed _

__

_ “Y-your right...” I whispered,a smile tugged at his lips _

__

_ “Then you need to wake up..” he told me, I felt sad that I had to leave him here _

__

_ “I need to go to sleep... then I should wake up.” I murmured, I hugged Mark again  _

__

_ “You can really go now.. I’ll be fine, really.” I assured him, pulling back  _

__

_ “If you don’t mind I’m going to stay just till you fall asleep.” He smiled, I frowned a little _

__

_ “are you sure? You want to wait here with this?” obviously referring to my family _

__

_ “I don’t mind. I just don’t want to be creepin over you well you try to sleep.” He chuckled, I murmured an “okay.” And made my way to my bedroom _

__

_ “And Mark-“ I glanced over my shoulder at him, trying to smile but I could feeling the overwhelming sadness plaster my face _

_ “Thank you.”  _

_ he blinked a few times “For what?” He shrugged, I rolled my eyes  _

_ “Just accept the thank you!” I yelled, he flinched _

_ “Okay.. okay jeez... You’re welcome?...” he looked and sounded a little confused. I entered my bedroom, It didn’t take long before I begin to drift off, my last thought being  _

__

_ ‘ I’ll miss you ’ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t know why every time I post a chapter I forget to add a note with a little context explaining the chapter. I imagine every time the reader falls unconscious in a dreams and moves to another it’s a another layer of sleep but the same dream.


	9. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He makes you give in but at what cost?

Anti got up back after recovering, he knew he had been unconscious for awhile but wasn’t sure for how long, what he did know he had to find her before it was too late. Her dreams and nightmares were endless and he couldn’t pinpoint her exact location, he could feel when he was or wasn’t moving in the right direction. He knew actually where she’d be but he had to be sure. He couldn’t fuck this up now. He had to find his home, dark’s home.

-

“Your home is boring.” She states bluntly, Dark utters a noise of frustration before turning to her

“Are you quite serious?” He hisses watching her poking one of the many mindless people idling in the entrance hall.

“You haven’t even been here five minutes and you’re already complaining about my home being boring?!” He yells. his shell cracking and the visions of him screaming around him in frustration, her words obviously hit a nerve.

“This isn’t fun looking. Why would I want to be one of your mindless slaves? I came here because you promised you’d hurt me.” She sounds whiny and demanding. Dark rolled his eyes, mumbling something about how the other one would be much more entertaining

“Excuse me?!” She hissed, snarling her face up in angry. Dark cleared his throat and turned back towards her

“I said! The other you would much more entertaining!” He shouted, his shell going crazy for a minute with the hallucinations of him yelling in and out of sync. Despite his threatening appearance she gritted her teeth and glared silently 

“And why do you have this excessive need to be punished!” He yelled and more of his hallucinations appeared, a few of them were glare and some were screaming. 

“Because we deserve it! She deserves it!“ she shouted back with a look that could kill. Dark settled back down into his calm shell, now looking mildly annoyed by her little tantrum 

“For what exactly?!” He sighs 

“Because she-“ 

She hissed pausing to grip her head, a way of confusion hit her and a cry escaped her throat. she doubled over in pain, yelling for ‘her’ to “stop it” 

“You stupid little-! Argh!” She yelled through gritted teeth. Her fit of pain came to halt, She looked back up taking in her current surroundings. Confusion briefly held her facial features before a horrified expression replaced it. she backed up, her eyes fell on Dark, he looked confused as well but it only took a second for it to click what had just happened

“Ah... there you are..” he strides toward me and panic fluttered in my gut 

I automatically moved backwards, I whipped around and ran toward the front door. Dark snapped his fingers and the mindless people around us moved ahead of me to the door, blocking off my only exit. I spun around again, Dark was staring intently like a predator staring at its prey.

“Now now, no need to be rude.. I haven’t even got to show you around your new home.” he calls quietly. I’m corned and can’t see a place to run other than the grand stair case, Dark was currently standing at bottom of them, I had to wait for him to move before even thinking about running to it.

“This isn’t my home..” I growled. He moves closer, cornering me further

“Such brave talk considering your legs look like their made of jello right now.” he mocks me with a chuckle and charming smile, annoying me. 

Without any thought or plan in mind, I bolted toward the stairs, I can hear him sigh and grab my arm as I try to move past him. He yanks me back against his chest, I thrash against him

I yell in frustration and he tries to cover my mouth, I bit his hand forcing him to release me. I stumbled forward and ran up the stairs but only make it halfway. Dark snapped his fingers again and a hand somewhere between the railing shot out and caught my ankle. I let out a quiet squeak as I fell forward against the staircase

“Tsk tsk naughty Cinderella... trying to run when the ball hasn’t even started yet...” he says all well stalking closer once more.I flipped over onto my back, trying to yank my ankle free but the hand clamped over my ankle seemed to have an grasp. 

“Why run? I only want what’s best for you.” Dark says. I ignored him and begin to claw at the hand but it seemed completely unfazed. It’s grip tightens more and more till a crunching sound emitted from my ankle. Dark crouched in front of me smirking widely at my cries of agony 

“See how hard you make this on yourself?” He snaps his finger again and the hand releases me. I tried to stand but only managed to stumbles forward a few times, I resorted to crawling up the stairs. 

Dark sighed behind me, obviously frustrated that I wasn’t giving him a chance to talk, let alone listen to him. He phased to the top of the stairs, still crouched and watching my feeble attempt escape him 

“I can help you... you won’t feel anything anymore. You won’t feel the hurt and pain of timelessly being hurt by Sean again and again. This can all just end if you just let me in...” he holds a hand down to me

“I already gave you my answer twice now... and you still don’t get it..” I glared up at him. His expression faltered and his charming smile faded into to a disappointed glare.

“You’re the one not getting it..” he growls grabbing me by my hair, I yelped in pain, clawing at his hand. He ignored my struggling and dragged me up the stairs with him, he threw me against the railing and yanked my head back.

“Look at them all... you have no choice. You cannot escape me...” he hisses in my ear, I feel my breath catch in my throat, watching as the mindless fans moved into the center of the room staring up at us blankly.

“You can join them, you won’t be scared or angry... you’ll be safe.” His voice is soft yet so demanding 

“I’m so tired of this...” I murmured, shutting my eyes tightly 

“You are welcome to rest here... you just have to let me in...” he releases my hair and begins to pet my head, trying to tame my wild thoughts 

“You won’t let him hurt me again?” I ask in a cracked voice 

“No. Never. I will keep you safe.” He assures, my gut knows it’s all lies.

‘If I do this. Anti will be angry. He will undoubtedly hurt me but then again what choice do I have? I can’t escape Dark and I don’t know what he’ll do to me if I keep refusing him. I don’t know wherever Anti is coming for me’

My thoughts race trying to focus on anything but Dark eye’s burning into the back of my head waiting for an answer.

“Well?” His voice snaps me from thought

“I... I.. um..” I stammered, grinding my teeth as my time worn thin

‘Everything is needles, everything is painful and I can’t see where I’ll be free from them, I don’t even know if want to be free. I can’t see anything but them, Jack and Mark smiling at me but it hurts, It hurts.’

“Yes...” I choked with tears blurring my vision

“Good girl...” he sounds happy but I just feel shameful, fearful. Anti will hate me.

-

Dark’s hand slides over her collar bone letting the infection flow through his fingertips. Nothing happened, he tried again but a green light zapped him. He held his hand, looking down at it, confused and angry.

She turned toward him, a surprised expression dawning on her features. A loud bang made her jump and look back down over the railing. Dark shot his gaze up and pushed her aside gently watching as the front door busted in, Anti walked in panting.

“ Found you...” Anti glared up at them, Dark sighed

“You are far too late.” Dark paused, placing a hand on her shoulder “She’s made her choice.” He announced, Anti’s eyes went wide briefly but scrunched back into a menacing glare

“You’re too late. The infection finally won over whatever the hell you tried injecting her with.” He paused, moving his glare to her

“You can’t escape.” He growls tightening his fist. Her breath hitches, she looks petrified. Dark snaps his fingers and the mindless fans on his accord begin to surround Anti.

My heart felt it was breaking, I stared down at Anti. I was afraid he’d die, afraid he’d win and hurt me again

“Enjoy your stay.” Dark hissed bitterly, the mindless begin attacking. 

He turned his focus on me once again, I stared worry wearing down onto my face, completely unsure of him or what his true attentions were.

Dark grabbed my wrist and attempted to pull me along but the pain made stumble and hiss quietly. He looks at my twisted ankle briefly without a second thought he yanked me forward and up over his shoulder, I squeaked in surprise.

-

Two mindless fans jumped at Anti dodged them with ease, punching one into the wall with a loud splat, kicking the other into a dinning table. More came at him, annoyed he pulled out his knife, stabbing one in the gut. He ducked under a fist and slashed their gut and another one across the neck

One of them pounced on his back, he thrashed trying to throw them off the rest surrounded him, he snarled and threw his head back against the one on his back and spun around slashing all their necks.

The rest came at him in a mindless effort to stop him. Anti was yelling, slashing at them right and left. Blood splattering on him as he torn through them with ease, rage being his puppeteer, controlling his moments in a rage induced performance. He tore apart Dark’s mindless slaves till he was soaked and none remained.

-

Dark was still running, something was starting feel deeply wrong, he couldn’t tell if it was her or Anti but something was unnerving him to no end, unnerving him to point of fleeing with a single, useless and apparently immune fan.

“Dark, where are we going?” She breaks his train of thought

“Away from here. Just for a while.” He lied through his teeth. He knew full well they weren’t ever coming back, not even for his mindless slaves, That is if any remained after Anti was done with them.

“Here we are.” He announced, he set me down gently. He walked pasted me, over to a giant mirror and shattered it, I rose a brow at him

“That’s 7 years bad luck.” I commented

“I’ve done this a million times. Trust me I’m cursed for life.” He chuckled watching the mirror’s shards reform into some sort of strange portal, each shard held different place in its reflection.

“We can escape through here into another dream.” He steps half way in but paused turning back to me with a hand held out

“Come on.”

I looked at his hand then back up at him a few times before hesitantly reaching out, our finger tips brushing “Stop!” A shrill and angry voice made me stopand whipped around toward a blood soaked Anti

I was frozen and couldn’t breath, I should have just left when I had the chance. He stepped closer to us, I felt dread building in me. Dark was tugging my wrist, still trying to tug me in but something made me resisted him

“Come on! He’s going to hurt you!” Dark yelled, she cranked her head towards him, both hers and Sean’s turning solid black, a sinister grin stretching across their faces

“She’s not coming with you.” Sean and her spoke in sync. Dark’s eyes went wide, he released her and backed into the portal, after a moment it fell back into pieces.

“Fucking pussy...” Anti hissed under his breath

“We’re going home.” He stated, turning away from me toward the doorway, a sadness falling across my face

“Anti I-“ he cut me off with a sharp glare over his shoulder, I swallowed nervously “Now!” He yelled. I cast my eyes to ground, my body wouldn’t stop shaking and my legs felt weak regardless of everything telling to flee from him I limped toward him slowly. He glanced down at my ankle then continued out the door, I followed him down the hall to the stairs.

A stench of iron hit me but I didn’t react, I was focusing on walking down the stairs, fearingI might fall. Halfway down, the stairs became stained with blood, more and more till I looked up at the entrance hall. I gasped at the scattered and bloodied bodies everywhere, I didn’t know why I was surprised, Anti literally came in dripping in blood.

“Are you coming? Or am I going to have to drag you back?” His voice pulled my attention, I nodded nervously and continued after him. Outside Dark’s house it was raining heavily, the weather made me sigh but I continued regardless 

I looked back at the house, somewhat sad and fearful of Anti and regretting not jumping into the portal when I had the chance. I bumped into Anti and jumped back staring up at his menacing stare.

I was beyond frightened watching him reach forward and I shut my eyes tightly expecting some sort of pain, or punishment but nothing happened. Anti picked me up by my hips, put me on his shoulder and begin walking again

“We’ll never make it home with you limping behind.” He mutters, I blink at him still fearful yet surprised he didn’t make limp home to add to my punishment. It seemed like forever but eventually we reached the forest containing my home and everything I feared, everything I hated, everything I loved was inside and waiting for me to come inside.

My house was insight now. everything inside me was panicking, I flinched with each step Sean took till he was on the porch. he sat me down in front of the door, I looked up at him with sadness weighing down in my face

“Anti I’m-“ he doesn’t give me a chance to even apologize, to explain myself or what had happen

“Get inside.” He orders in a 

“But I just-“ I try again but it only agitates him further

“Just get inside!” He yells a glitch runs through his body violently. I feels tears burn my eyes I turned to the door but hesitate after a moment I gripped the door handle and turned it looking back briefly at Anti as I entered

“ See you soon... ” his eyes turned black

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m almost done with this story however I plan to polish it up a little when I post the final chapter. I’m probably going to change somethings around like certain names and whatever but nothing too crazy.


	10. Lost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He’s loses you in the worse way possible.

I woke up again, confusion fogs my mind, I stared at the kitchen ceiling for longer than I’d like to, I was lost in thought trying to remember how I ended up on the floor. I finally attempted to sit up but a heavy weight stopped me. I immediately knew why and it’s not fair. My panic built more and more till I’m struggling and crying beneath him, I feel his arms tighten around me like a snake till it hurts and a quiet whimper escape my lips.

“You tried to leave me...” he whispers. I froze in place, my breath hitched in my throat and I felt dread wash over me, all I could think was ‘Why? Why? Why!’ His voice pulled me from thought 

“I can’t believe you... you tried to leave me again... ” He raises his voice a little above a whisper. To my surprise and relief he releases me and stands up, I stared expecting him to do something but he didn’t. I stood slowly, the throbbing pain in my ankle is the only thing stopping me from running, though I knew I wouldn’t get far.

“After all this time I thought you’d learn.... I thought you would understand that you would never get away no matter how times you struggled...” he runs a hand down his face. He’s already glitching in front of me and I can’t decide if I feel scared or just angry at him. He knows it wasn’t my fault, he knew Dark was threatening me and yet Anti still blamed me over everything.

“No matter how many times I give you another chance.... you just try to run again and again and again!” He yells his voice turns to static a few times and his body glitches as he snaps his head towards me, I automatically flinched. His face is monsteras, snarling at me with sharp teeth all well he was glitching out a lot

He steps forward backing me against at the wall, He towers over me. I feel tiny compared to him, overwhelmed, powerless yet I still gridded my teeth and glared up at him, angry overwhelmed the fear inside me.

“If you’re so disappointed and angry with me then just kill me..” I raised my voice a little, my words made him paused and his snarl faded down into a scowl, his hand out stretched to my cheek, softly cupping it

“You’re the first one to survive the infection. I have no intention on killing you but you do need to be punished.” I feel my heart stop, his words felt a slap to my face

“W-what?” I murmured confused, he silent but now looks conflicted

“What do you mean first? And successful?... ” shock washed over my face and he averted his gaze

“Did...” I paused exhaling loudly, his scowl returns and he lowered his hand from my cheek

“Did you infect me... knowing I could die... knowing everyone else before me died?!” angry was clear in my voice

“What choice did I have?! He was going to get you! He was already so close to taking away from me!” He screams in my face.

Tears leak from my eyes and I can’t stop myself from raising my hand and slapping him, he doesn’t seem fazed. Everything hurts, I’ve been lied to over and over again, hurt physically, mentally repeatedly and yet I still was shocked he would do such thing. When I would I learn to stop caring? When would he learn I did actually care?

“I’m not yours! You don’t get to lose me!” I screamed, tears stung my eyes and Anti snarled a little, his body vibrates with various glitches 

“You are now.”

I felt disgust building in my throat. I shook my head and wiped the tears in my eyes. I don’t want to be his anymore and I now regretted not going with Dark, all I can think about is how I’d better off being a mindless slave than feeling how I feel right now.

“You know...I wish I had gone with Dark..” I hissed, his hand runs down to my throat gripping it tightly enough to be threatening

“That’s not gonna happen now. Your choices are long extinct . ” He glitches a little as he speaks

“This entire time I thought you cared! I thought after all this you would finally love me! Instead you want me here just so you won’t be alone!” my shoulders tensing, I shut my eyes tightly

“My feelings never mattered! I never mattered to you!” my tears squeezing themselves from my eyes, now rolling down my face

“I-If I was with Dark right now.... I wouldn’t feel how I feel right now... I wouldn’t care like I’m doing now! And I wouldn’t have to deal with a psycho!” I screamed, my shoulders shook

“You want me to love you? I can love you.” He whispers but his voice lacks kindness, what he offers isn’t love, His eyes bore into mine, they lack warmth. He grips my jaw roughly, the angry fades from my face and horror clicks in my mind at my mistake of words

“It’s far too late for take backs...” his eyes turn black

“Dark won’t love you... not like I will...” he murmured leaning into my ear

“Don’t..” I choked tears steaming down my face again

“You’re mine.” He whispers bitting my ear lob, my body tenses in response.

His beard tickles my face as he moves to my cheek pecking it briefly then moving to my mouth, he kisses me and it hurts, it doesn’t bring me happiness, it’s not love. It’s just hurt. I try to turn my head away, to resist his advances but his hands grip my face. He pulls back briefly then kisses me again nibbling at my bottom lip, I whimpered in response. He kissing my neck, nibbling, and sucking leaving me marks for me to remember days after.

I’ve lost him. He going’s to hurt me in the worse way possibly. He’s angry and hates me now, I can’t blame him though. I did tried to abandon him after all. Now he is going to take my feelings, chew them up and spit them out. He will devour me because he’s afraid I’ll leave him all alone, it’s my fault.

“Anti...” I choke out my hands slid up to his arms, he doesn’t respond nor react to my touch

“It is my fault... I didn’t have faith in you. I was scared and didn’t know what to do, I honestly didn’t know if you’d find me in time and I didn’t know what Dark would do if I kept refusing him...” I murmured, silent tears rolled out of my eyes. He still didn’t respond to me. I gridded my teeth, fighting back the sobs in my throat

“I know those are just excuses. I know I saying sorry won’t fix this... but..” I paused, cupping his face softly

“You can take it out on me if you’d like... I’ll forgive you for it.. “ I whispered pecking his lips, he glitches softly in response.

“ why?” Anti asked through gritted teeth, he brings his head up staring at me with a scowl yet tears were threatening to spill down his face

“You want to be hurt by me... you wanted to be punished for murders you never committed..”

“Murders? I committed?” I questioned, he didn’t answer me instead he asked “You don’t remember?” I stared at him and felt a sense of dread wash over me

“Your family was ****** ** * ******** * **** ***” I cringed at his words, they were glitched and sounded high pitch, painful to hear. I couldn’t understand him and nothing made sense anymore

“Do you remember?”

A smiling face of someone I didn’t recognize flashed into my mind. Was this his doing? Did he really want to punish me that bad? To point of making me remember something that never happened or did it? Was I lying to myself?

Anti stared, her expression changed from sad to panicked, her body quivering. She shoved him back and held her head tightly, looking pained as she shouted to no one in particular 

“It’s my fault!”

-

_ “I’ll be back! Just going for a snack run and a little late night ride.” I told my mom with a smile _

__

_ “Alright be safe!” _

__

_ I wonder now why I didn’t say ‘you too.’ Maybe she still be here with me. _

__

_ “Oh you need anything from the store?” I paused peering back into at her, she shook her head and I nodded with a small smile before leaving out the door. _

__

_ “Why did you leave them?” _

-

“I shouldn’t have said anything! You don’t have to remember until you’re ready!” Anti was yelling but I couldn’t listen. Everything is numbing itself in my mind, memories begin to fade and nothing mattered anymore. He shaking me gently, still trying to bring me out of it but I want to stay here, where it’s safe and quiet, Where I won’t remember.

“Please!... please!” He yelling and patting my face softly.

I don’t want this, I don’t want to be here, I don’t want you to see me. I’m disgusting, can’t you see it? Of corse you can, this why you’ve treated me so badly! You know, you’ve seen it all along.

“I’m sorry.. I’m so sorry.. I shouldn’t have reminded you.” he hugs me but it just hurts, everything hurts. My mind is throbbing in and out of overwhelming memories I had long to forget. I remembered meeting him in my house, in the living room where my family hanged from the ceiling, their forced smiles haunting me.

“Hurt me” I whispered, he tenses

“What? No don’t do that. You didn’t do anything.” He sounds so desperate, so fragile unlike before when he was threatening me

“Hurt me...”

“No, please don’t do this again... “ I feel him rest his head on my shoulder, his damp tears leaking onto my skin

“Hurt me...”

“Please don’t leave me... not like this..” he begging, I can’t listen to him. The disgust is overwhelming me, it’s all too much. I don’t want to remember anymore, I don’t want to see myself.

‘It’s my fault...’

“Please come back... I’ll try to be better.. we can go for walks again like we use to... I’ll try not to be so possessive.. please..” Anti chokes but she’s long gone, her mind is rotted away by the terrible memories

“It’s not your fault... it’s mine..” Anti whimpered cradling her closer to him

“Please come back...”

  
”hurt me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well I finished it! I promise there will be some kind of sequel, probably not any time soon but sometime in the future! I really enjoyed writing this this story and plan on polishing it up a little. Some of the chapters were kind of rushed and I plan to fix them up a little.

**Author's Note:**

> I’m kind of nervous about posting this because it’s one of my first stories with more than 1 part. Another thing! Every dream in this story is actually something I actually dreamt about, kind of weird but it was the main thing that inspired me!


End file.
